{"id":2486,"date":"2012-08-28T03:00:12","date_gmt":"2012-08-28T10:00:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.scottcochrane.com\/?p=2486"},"modified":"2012-08-28T09:12:32","modified_gmt":"2012-08-28T16:12:32","slug":"the-top-5-things-pastors-think-but-can-never-say","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/2012\/08\/28\/the-top-5-things-pastors-think-but-can-never-say\/","title":{"rendered":"The Top 5 Things Pastors Think, But Can Never Say"},"content":{"rendered":"

One of my favourite bloggers, Ben Reed (@BenReed<\/a>) recently posted an article called What Pastors Really Mean When They Say\u2026<\/a> This post provided a fresh, sometimes hilarious, insight into what pastors say<\/em> versus what they mean<\/em>.<\/p>\n

The post immediately prompted me to flash back to my days as executive pastor of a large church, and had me reflecting on a related theme; What pastors think<\/em> but can never say<\/em>.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>
Image via iStockPhoto.com<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Here is my top 5 list of things we think, but never say:<\/p>\n

1.\u00a0\u00a0 The way things were done in your former church really doesn\u2019t interest me<\/strong>
\n\u201cYou know pastor, at my old church our pastor always had a special story time for the children before dismissing them to Sunday School.\u201d<\/p>\n

What are we thinking that we simply can\u2019t say? \u201cSo what…\u201d<\/p>\n

2.\u00a0\u00a0 The reasons I fired your favourite staff person are none of your business<\/strong>
\n\u201cPastor, you fired one of my favourite people. Why did you do that?\u201d<\/p>\n

What are we thinking that we simply can\u2019t say? \u201cI\u2019m not about to disclose the details of someone\u2019s personnel file with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

3.\u00a0\u00a0 I just finished preaching – I just can\u2019t deal with your problem right now<\/strong>
\n\u201cNice sermon pastor. But I need help with a marriage issue.\u201d<\/p>\n

What are we thinking that we simply can\u2019t say? \u201cI don\u2019t have an ounce of emotional or spiritual energy for this right now.\u201d<\/p>\n

4.\u00a0\u00a0 I\u2019m sorry\u2026What\u2019s your name?<\/strong>
\n\u201cPastor! Fancy running into you here at the grocery store!\u201d<\/p>\n

What are we thinking that we simply can\u2019t say? \u201cI know I\u2019ve seen you every Sunday for five years, but frankly I just don\u2019t know who you are.\u201d<\/p>\n

5.\u00a0\u00a0 Your giving is really more of a bribe<\/em><\/strong>
\n\u201cPastor until the music volume is toned down I won\u2019t be tithing to the church.\u201d<\/p>\n

What are we thinking that we simply can\u2019t say? \u201cUntil you stop attaching strings to your giving, just don\u2019t give.\u201d<\/p>\n

My point is not that we should actually blurt out everything we\u2019re thinking. That can be incredibly cruel. It\u2019s simply that in church leadership we must constantly manage the tension between appropriate truth telling and wise discretion.<\/p>\n

How do you know if you get this wrong<\/em>? Oh, you\u2019ll know. Believe me, you\u2019ll know\u2026<\/p>\n

What would you add to this list?<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

One of my favourite bloggers, Ben Reed (@BenReed) recently posted an article called What Pastors Really Mean When They Say\u2026 This post provided a fresh, sometimes hilarious, insight into what pastors say versus what they mean. The post immediately prompted me to flash back to my days as executive pastor of a large church, and…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_bbp_topic_count":0,"_bbp_reply_count":0,"_bbp_total_topic_count":0,"_bbp_total_reply_count":0,"_bbp_voice_count":0,"_bbp_anonymous_reply_count":0,"_bbp_topic_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_reply_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_forum_subforum_count":0,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[22,478,12],"tags":[686,708,928,50,950],"class_list":["post-2486","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-church","category-featured","category-tension","tag-discernment","tag-honesty","tag-managing-tension","tag-pastor","tag-thoughts"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2486","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2486"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2486\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2492,"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2486\/revisions\/2492"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2486"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2486"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/scottcochrane.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2486"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}